Est-ce que tu aimes le sex? Driver roll up the partition pleeeeease…
Pertinent stats: 28, from Arkansas, 5’9″-ish. Like the near-saint I am, I’ve decided to go out with a guy who is slightly shorter than me (Jesus, canonization is imminent!). This decision mostly has to do with two things: his online user name is a pretty funny 30 Rock reference and he’s getting his PhD from Cal in chemistry (hello brilliant future children), and I’m very much on board with both of these things. As a friend pointed out, this is my chance to act out any Big Bang Theory fantasies (I mean, the difference between me and Kaley Cuoco is negligible). However, I can’t quite seem to drum up much enthusiasm about this guy, to the point where thirty minutes before the date, I am binge watching porn trying to get something going downstairs. What, that’s not how you prep for dates?
Beardliness: Zero beards.
Bald face and head like a Mexican hairless cat. Not sure if I’m into that. Continue reading